Butt in Chair- Get it Done With Minimal Hair-Pulling
So, as every avid writer knows, there are various "full proof" methods for beating procrastination and writer's block, and getting down to the nitty-gritty of story telling. Despite this helpful array, I tend to gravitate toward the old fashioned "Butt-in-chair" method, that is to say, sitting on my rear end long enough to lose feeling in my legs and run out of coffee money. Laughable? Yes. Silly? Maybe. But keeping my bottom in a chair and my hands on the keys for hours guarantees that I'll have at least something to show for my numb posterior at the end.
Let me take you through the five reasons why this method can work: (though it may be a pain in the butt literally as well as knock out back, legs and sanity but only if you are over the age of 40 :)
1. It Minimizes Distractions
Now, note that I said minimizes and not "eliminates" or "destroys." This is so because, despite the fact that we have made the pact to stay in this chair for hours, we as writers tend to get distracted by any and every idea in our heads that may lead to, oh I don't know, a trip to Walmart for an embroidered notebook that may "further organize our ideas". Right. Try again. However, imagine how much more difficult it is to be distracted if you're sitting in an empty room, placed firmly in a chair with a blank screen in front of you. No people, just sitting and writing. Much better.
2. It's Easier to Snack
Let's face it, any good book is written with a plethora of dried figs and yogurt raisins. Well, the snacks vary (more like MMs and candy corn), but you get the gist. I like this method because it allows me to pack all of my favorite snacks into a giant bag and camp out in front of my computer. Healthy? Maybe not. Good incentive? You bet. I promised myself I'd sit in this chair until I accomplished something, and if I have easy access to food, all the better.
3. It's Hard to Nap
Okay we've all been there. It's 6pm and you're in your bed with your computer, when suddenly bam- lights out. No warning required, your body sees words on a screen and just goes into hyper sleep drive (HSD for short, there will be a blog on the treatments for Hyper Sleep Drive in the future, rest assured). However, with your rear end in a very cold and uncomfortable chair, you may just have a chance at staying awake long enough to clean up that last chapter.
Any excuse I get to buy a latte, I take it. But here we have the perfect formula for caffeine consumption: a goal, a chair, and a possible all-nighter. As a writer I love my coffee, but when I'm sitting down for hours at a time and need to stay focused, there's nothing better than a hot mug and a dream.
5. My Kids Won't Bother Me
I don't know about you, but I have kids that love to walk up and ask me how I'm doing. This will immediately cause me to lose my train of thought and throw me deep into the dark abyss of writing purgatory, where ideas wave goodbye to me over the vast expanse of a never ending ocean of book sadness. Not good. But when I turn off my phone and seclude myself in my office with a chair, immediately this interruption is no longer a threat. I can be the caffeine hogging, idea pumping writer that I so need to be. (This one is not proven yet though :) Because my kids can open doors!
Well there you have it folks- all the reasons why sitting yourself down and forcing yourself to write will make all the difference in the world. Simply finding a chair and making the time is the hardest part, what with all the distractions of life, (and doughnuts), but it's what being a writer is all about.