- All giveaways from the Untraceable launch will go out on Monday. Sorry but it was so much, it took me a few weeks to get together. :) You know who you are.
- Untraceable was listed #77 in action and adventure last night. So thanks for your continued support. If you want some extra copies - the ebook is on sale for the holiday - limited time only. It will be $.99 cents until Jan 1st and then it will return to $2.99. So how can you pass it up?? ;)
- The winner of Megg Jensen's book (Anathema) and swag is Hannah Hale. send your address to firstname.lastname@example.org and it will go out with Monday's massive batch.
- BIG announcement and mega giveaway on Monday - come back and see :) Let's just say it is another experiment. Also I will talk through my lessons learned in self pubbing next week too to hopefully help others on this journey. I will give you an update on sales.
- Here is a marketing series I've been doing on Daphne (KT Literary's blog) part 1 (kickoff), 2 (Branding) and 3 (Platform). Next week part 4 and 5 will finish the series from branding all the way through creating a marketing plan. Stop by and let me know if you have questions!
DevaVu Blog Fest
Today I am joining in to my friend's DL Hammon's Deja Vu Blog Fest where hundreds of writers/bloggers are posting your favorite post of all time.
I had a hard time choosing. In the end, I did not choose my favorite but it was certainly the hardest for me to write in the 3 years I've been blogging. It was also the first time I had really felt a ton of support. And at the time I needed it.
Yes, I'm slowly returning from the cyber dead.
And I've missed you guys. As weird as that sounds.
To be honest, I've had a few publishing world setbacks over the summer that I haven't really wanted to be honest, I've been hiding out. Embarrassed, sad, excited about new opportunities and projects, relieved, mad, frustrated, hopeful and yet totally discouraged with this industry overall.
Over the last 2 years, I've moved out of ignorant bliss into a confusing reality.
That's not to say it's bad but sometimes those realizations and changes hurt because they are not always what you want. I've realized a few things about this industry:
*not everyone good gets published
*not everyone published is good
*a great agent doesn't mean they are good for you
*as much as we love writing, it's a business and it's about money.
*It's hard to reconcile passion with money.
*Its all in the timing
* Doesn't matter who you know, its down to have a good book that hits at
the right time.
*Even though this industry feels as though it moves slow, I think it moves fast. A door that is open one month is closed the next.
*No matter what you do or how hard you work, you cant force anything.
So I guess I will come clean so I can move forward honestly and openly.
My awesome agent and I decided to part ways. To be honest, even though my agent was awesome and hardworking and communicative and fun and supportive, sometime you need a fresh perspective and something different than you did 2 years before. My writing has changed, my genre has changed, and my direction has changed. All relationships are unpredictable - some are for a reason, a season or a lifetime. This one for me was a season, although at the time we paired up - I always assumed it would be for a lifetime. Why would we part? Why would I leave? Why would we not work? What would change? Answer: we never know.
And though I adored (still do) my former agent, sometimes the person you adore and respect still may not be the right person for you. And no matter how brilliant they are or how far they get you or how much they help you grow, sometimes you can only grow so far and can't grow anymore until you let go. The last few months have been hard and confusing. I've second guessed the decision, I've wondered if moving on was a mistake, I've unfairly questioned her, and have even questioned my own writing ability.
But now that I am on the other side, its like all relationships. Remember the special love you found when you were younger, the guy who was great and cute and funny and perfect for you on paper, but for some reason, he wasn't the right one for you but you couldn't not explain why. You felt crazy to give him up but scared to stay knowing it was not long term. The one you didnt want to leave b/c you were scared you may not find another who loved you as much. And no matter how great he was or how much you so wanted him to be the long term one, you couldn't force it if your visions/future didn't align or your timing is off. And you question if you will ever love again.
Thats' how I feel now.
Know what I mean?
To start over is hard when you think you are just about to make it. I've been to acquisitions so many times, I've lost count. I've done so many noncontractual revisions, I've lost a sense of my writing, and I've gotten so close, it's broken my heart more than once. To realize you can get that close to a dream so many times, to bust your ass and do everything you are supposed to do and more - and still - not make it. I never thought that was an option for me. I think I'm a giving person and a positive person and the last three months have really challenged that. It's been hard to be supportive of those making it, hard to hide my own bitterness towards the process, and hard to find the motivation and confidence to push forward.
Anyway, I miss my agent. Miss her ideas and funny jokes. I think we did great things but there comes a time that in order to move on you have to let go of something and take a chance. So here I am faced with an unknown truth and scared that maybe I've taken a wrong turn somewhere. Scared I may never realize a dream. Afraid I wont find that agent or editor who believes in me as much as I believe in myself.
As always, people bounce back but I guess I thought once you got to a certai
n point, there was nowhere to go but up. And now I realize that's not the way it always is. Sometimes, you take 3 steps forward and then 2 steps back, having faith that you have still made progress.
So for now, I'm working on a new project and starting completely over, hoping that my time has not somehow passed me by. Hoping that I get another chance to make a difference. Praying that my vision is the same vision as a higher power. Trying to have faith in a process that is so subjective and random and finicky and unpredictable.
The only things I do know for sure.
Passion + luck+ timing+ persistence is the key to publishing. But fate is the deciding factor.
I love writing and love so many people in this industry. But sometimes you can only get yourself so far before fate and serendipity take over. Timing is so important and that is something I am not in control of....ever. Hard for me to admit or imagine.
Anyway, thanks for listening. I wasn't going to say anything but to be honest, everyone talks about the good and no one ever talks about the tough parts or the sad parts or the struggles until something good happens. And I needed to come clean for me so I can reach back out again to my friends online - the ones I've abandoned in the face of hard decisions and disappointment.
So to all my beautiful online friends, I'm sorry I have not been very available and thanks for your support.
Of course, I'd love to hear your thoughts.....