I was sitting up last night, trying to write but instead procrastinating by thinking of resolutions. I realized I make the same ones every year and have for #$ years.
This year,it's time for another New Year's Revolution. That means, no more annual promises to make.
So...here are all the promises I promise to break this year.
1) No more eating chocolate. (Yeah right. This year I'm going to eat 2 a day! Maybe even 3.)
2) Lose 5 pounds. (This year I think I'm going to try and 2 lbs. Oops - CHECK!)
3) Write 1000 words a day. (Whatever, I'll never make it anyway. Why set myself up for failure. Just to prove it - today I'm going to write ZERO words tomorrow.)
4) Going zen about the writing process. (Nah, I'd rather freak out when I can. It shows that I'm not dead inside.)
5) No more damn cussing. (Shit, my potty mouth is here to stay - sorry!)
6) Look my best everyday. (I'm not even going to dignify this one with a response.)
7) Saving money. (Impossible, I don't have any.)
8) Getting healthy. (I'm thinking cheetos count - a balanced meal with protein dairy, fat and carbs.)
9) Reading adult literature and poetic essays. (No way I'm giving up on my MG and YA. Just makes it hard to connect with friends who are reading Sarah Palin's biography and JayZ's book.)
10) Go totally green. (I try so hard but I tend to only make it to a bright lime-green.)
11)Chill out on social networking. (Hi my name is Shelli. I am a social network alcoholic and LOVE IT!)
12) Get out more and lead an exciting life. (Forget it, I'm boring and fine with it. Give me TV, my bed, pizza, and a book any day. Lucky for me hubby feels the same :)
13) Dress for success. (What? Give up Target, jeans, and Uggs? Give me my brand Mossimo any day?)
14) Watch less trash TV........ (Yeah right. I'm going to add another show just to rebel.Maybe even TMZ reruns)
15) Be a better wife, mother, friend, sister, daughter. (Nah, I think I already do a pretty good job. Who needs perfection?)
16) Stop repeating myself over and over and over and over again to my kids. (This is not going to happen any time soon.)
17) Watch more news. (Why? When it's so depressing?)
18) Cook more. (ie Get new microwave, learn to use a crock pot, and get a frozen box cutter. (the boxes are killing my nails.)
19) Did I say write more? (I write as much as I can.)
20) Call family and friends more. (I say to them - get on Facebook you losers!)
Happy New year!
What about you? What is your revolution for this year? What resolutions do you plan on breaking?