An agent who is seeking a YA suspense or a Tween paranormal. One has a witty, self-sufficient, smart, sarcastic, outdoorsy, electronic-savvy protagonist named Grace. The other, a deadly girl named Gabby.
I would like an agent who can happily commit to a long-term relationship.
- loves to carry my manuscripts in his/her briefcase
- refuses a kindle until my books are on it
- love my characters, loves my humor, and absolutely adores me
- believes with all their heart that my book will do great things
- laughs in the face of economic times, knowing my book will prevail all recessions
- calls me every day and showers me with compliments and multiple offers
- has no edits for any of my subs knowing they are from pure perfection
My perfect agent is:
- a relative or close friend of Oprah's
- works 24/7
- someone who loves my voice
- free or freeish
- doesn't mind 15 emails from me a day
- responds to every email with care and love
- wants me as his/her only client so thy can focus 150% of their time on my book
- laughs at my jokes
- refers to me as "my #1 writer"
- write good...I mean well.
- revise with a smile
- offer 20% instead of standard 15% commission
- only email once a day and turn off the "return receipt"
- never prank call editors using your name
- never use a dangling modifier, or a comma, splice
- stay true to my character' arcs
- mention you in my book acknowledgements...at least twice
- give you a shout-out when I am on on Oprah
- not complain too much about my book cover
- not send you holiday cards with glitter
- never use any cliche - to safe the life of me
- to always show and not tell
Shouldn't be too hard to find, right?